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Monday, May 4, 2020

Moving forward in May

For the record books- on the first Saturday in May in 2020 there was indeed festivity in our life on Newark-Granville! Thank you for those that viewed the videos celebrating Peter and our efforts to keep the day special.  Like so much happening during this pandemic there are silver linings and I am impressed and grateful for all the creativity and innovation.  It was actually fun to sip a delicious julep and watch the 2015's coverage of the Derby- something we don't do when we host a party with more than five!  The great race simulation placing the triple crown winners against one another was pretty cool!

Other happenings in our life....I have to document the fabulous Works and the fun we've - okay- I've had with the Mastodon.  I titled this one- not now Mommy is putting!  Follow the works on social media and #attheworks to learn more and see all the other great places the Burning Tree Mastodon is visiting!

I'll keep this one simple- I highly recommend the book by Jason Fagone, The Woman Who Smashed Codes: A True Story of Love, Spies and the Unlikely Heroine who Outwitted Americas's Enemies.   It was great company on my drive to and from Maryland and then I had to finish it for book club discussion.  I took a glorious long long walk around Granville yesterday to wrap it all up and was completely pulled in to the unknown history of Elizebeth Friedman- a smart, brave, independent woman- scientist.

Thank you to all that have shared their condolences and support. We're doing okay, we're processing- just as we all are for so many situations right now.  It feels as if my father's death was an extra shroud pulled forward at this time in our lives.  We're remembering and honoring his legacy and finding comfort in conversation, memories, and special happenings centered around the things he loved most- family, exploration, learning, and creativity! See above.

Friday, May 1, 2020

Derby 2020- Joe blog take-over- the Bourbon Histories!

Joe here, this is a Life on Newark-Granville Rd blog takeover!  Something great happened to me this week, something I’ve never been able to do pre-coronavirus.  I bought a bottle of Blanton’s at the IGA.  For those who are new to bourbon, Blanton’s is an excellent wheated (the mashbill contains wheat instead of rye) bourbon from Buffalo Trace.  This is the same distiller that blessed the world with Weller, Col EH Taylor, Eagle Rare and Old Rip and Pappy Van Winkle.  
So I thought I would write about the history of bourbon at the Derby party…the last couple of years we have been using Evan Williams to mix in our juleps, but it was not always that way.  One thing to note, I married into this party – some grooms get a dowry, I got a Derby Party – I will take that trade any day of the week.  When Susan and I were living in Grandview, we had a make-your-own-julep bar.  We had a big poster board with the instructions on how to make a julep and all the ingredients on a prettily decorated table.  About halfway through the party I asked one of my friends how he liked his julep.  His answer surprised me, he said it was the worst drink he ever had.  I asked him how he made it and he said he just poured it from the pitcher – the pitcher contained the simple syrup – he was 2/3 of the way through a glass of sugar water!  I do admire his determination.  
When we moved to Granville, all of our friends drank Makers Mark, Susan and I drink scotch we weren’t really bourbon drinkers and we were use to paying more than $50 for a bottle of single malt, so we mixed our juleps with Makers Mark.  About half way through the party my good friends Pat Ford and Craig Baldwin started to question my judgement – why waste Makers by mixing it in a julep.  I also noticed that a bottle of Makers Mark migrated from the bar to a table surrounded by my dear friends.  Since then we went with better blending bourbon and settled on Evan Williams, usually imported from Maryland (hopefully I am not breaking any laws).  A fine $20 bourbon.  We also provide a jug of Makers Mark on a table surrounded by our cigar smoking, bourbon drinking Granville friends.  We also enjoy when Laura Hills delivers her bottle of Heaven Hill every year and we mix a batch of juleps with this whiskey (FYI, Heaven Hill distillery also makes Evan Williams).  One thing I learned is never let the mother-in-law pick the bourbon, one year we couldn’t make it to MD to purchase our bourbon, so we let Susan’s mother buy it for us.  I thought the instructions were clear, evidently they were not, we ended up with smaller bottles of Evan Williams single barrel – we ran out of bourbon so I had to raid my personal stash – this did not save us any money.  I’d be remiss without giving a huge shout out to our amazing bartender these past few years- Emily.  Executing the party has been so much more enjoyable with your partnership. You always follow Susan’s number one rule- the bar must be ready by the time the first guest arrives!  Even for the early arriving Parson boys.
I hope you enjoyed this short report on the history of bourbon at the Leithauser Derby Party, we have enjoyed having you all attend over the years and will miss you dearly in 2020.

Wednesday, April 29, 2020

Annual Run for the Roses Party- Derby 2020 during a Pandemic and Peter Grad Party status!

Start making your plans to join us- virtually- on the 1st Saturday in May, May 2, 2020.  
We hope you will:
-host your own derby party in your home, during "shelter at home".
-make a mint julep- recipe on link below!  Mint is growing around town and available at Ross Market (IGA) in clamshell packs.
-prepare traditional Kentucky Derby foods:  https://www.kentuckyderby.com/party/recipes- including juleps!
-tune in at 5:45 pm for a new virtual race- https://www.courier-https://www.courier-journal.com/story/sports/horses/kentucky-derby/2020/04/29/fantasy-kentucky-derby-race-matches-13-triple-crown-winners/3039266001/
-join us at 6:20-for a cyber toast to....Peter Leithauser! On Zoom- get in touch with us for the code! This was supposed to be his graduation party blended into Derby party!
-post and share pictures from past Leithauser Annual Derby parties!
-add making a donation at this awesome collection event- Sat am:  https://www.michaeldeangibbs.org/post/covid-19-collection-drive-for-boys-girls-club-big-brothers-big-sisters-and-granville-students

We will:
-be mulching and getting the house as ready as we can for spring!
-drinking mint juleps and using silver and our past race glasses
-drinking Granville Brewing and Yuengling.....hmmm we may be drinking all day and you know what Joe says- to drink all day you have to start in the morning!  Granville Brewing FB  list of this week's brews!
-enjoying last year's pizza treat from FireUp Pizza- we picked some up at the IGA! https://fireduppizza614.com/
-decorating the house to honor Peter- Granville High School Class of 2020, excited to join Wabash College in the class of 2024!
-toasting with you either on Zoom or Facebooklive or both....
-plan to host a live party when the derby runs on Sept 5, 2020!
-gather with you all to toast Peter live when we know more about his graduation.


We are still:
-figuring out what to wear! Do I wear the dress I bought for Peter's graduation?  Wear a red hat- last year I went with yellow and gold for Clare and Wooster colors as it was her combined party.
-setting our menu- lots of cookie debate tonight at our planning meeting (dinner)
-missing being together!



Stay tuned for updates and more information. This year is a bit subdued not only by the COVID-19 virus but the death of Michael Stoner- see earlier posts. He wants us to go on and loved this party and meeting so many attendees when he attended and ran our betting booth!

I love seeing the fun folks are having at home and I'm in the mood for a party- a Derby party- but I will miss you!  That's what life is all about: Let's have a party. Let's have it tonight.      Lilly Pulitzer  Okay- not tonight but on the 1st Saturday in May!

Thursday Update- How do I even prep for Derby this year- do I know how to keep it low key?  So strange! And I am grieving this too- I was grieving before my father's death- it feels like a big old swirly, smoothie of emotions these days.  Memories help, friends and family help- the cards I'm opening in the mail are beautiful. 

Added Thursday:  Granville Brewing and Yuengling- advice- one or two juleps is plenty!! Fired Up Pizza link And info on the collection drive happening Sat am- beautiful story/foundation!!

Friday Update- So touched by so many, figuring this out- just thinking and prepping in this 2020 way brings me joy.  Here is a fun video I hope to load- if not make sure you watch in your own browser- PERFECT!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m16LBQNUNoY

Friday update- not enough room for Joe's take over- he gets his own- don't miss the bourbon histories! on a seperate post.  The house is shaping up nicely- special thank you to those helping!! Joe mowed the lawn...remember fondly dear friends helping with this task!   And if you look on Facebook you will see how our Mastedon is helping us with our prep!!


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Tuesday, April 28, 2020

The Long Farewell and April Wrap-Up

My father's MDS diagnosis-https://www.mds-foundation.org  ten years ago was scary and we're grateful for the physician that diagnosed and supported his journey.  He became a good friend to my parents. Those ten years were filled with life.  There were ups and downs, I recall the relief when my parents understood the MDS could be managed.  If anyone wants or needs to discuss this I am happy to.  The MDS did take a toll on my father and his energy eventually did decrease and his mobility was curtailed. Another friend with MDS said it well- I never go far from my blood. This dear man died in December. I'd say the past year he wasn't quite the Daddy I knew but there were moments and he tried. He was there for Clare's graduation and our summer vacation- arranging the weekly blood at this point to work for the travel. It truly has felt like a long farewell and I know how lucky I am to have had this.  The decision to stop the blood transfusions and call hospice was his and Mom's- they did it together.  I'll never forget the phone call when he shared the decision and understanding his life was ending.

Thank you, Hospice. https://hospiceofwc.org  Thank you to my doctor and friend for answering my questions and preparing me. Thank you, Mom, and Dad for the conversations and honesty. Thank you, Joe, and my kids for sending me off to Maryland and keeping things going. Thank you, Denison, for all the support. Thank you friends here, there and everywhere for checking in, texting, calling. Thank you radio stations for classical and oldies, and bluegrass CDs to comfort and keep company. Thank you FPC- Karen for talking and coaching. Thank you, Matthew, and Dawn, Greg and Sarah- my siblings- we did it together. We supported Mom and Dad and one another. We had over three weeks from that phone call until he died and that was a gift.

We created a service in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic that worked for us.  A beautiful graveside service on April 25. A beautiful blue sky day- crisp and clear with sun, clouds and good temps.  We agreed on comforting scripture, were grateful to have a trumpet play beautiful hymns and shared the poem- Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Eve by Robert Frost.  The pastor shared the message we all believe- it was not goodbye, it was farewell.  God sent us Jesus to show us the promise of heaven and resurrection.  Daddy is in heaven no doubt about it.  He is with my grandmothers- his mother who died of leukemia when my father was eight and my mother's mother he loved dearly, bickered with about politics at the Sunday table and loved her daughter- he lays to rest next to her.  (Funerals and visits to gravesides are important- my kids didn't realize Sally shares a birthday with Gaga- thankyou headstone!) We each put a flower with his ashes and thanked him for being the father, husband and grandfather he was. We will be the best we can be because he lived and lives on in us.  We then were given the extra treat of a carillon concert at Mercersburg.  My parents often drive up there on Sundays for this purpose. My brother made the call and the carilloner was able to delight and comfort us with music in a beautiful setting.





Music shared that day included: Dvorak's Coming Home, The Mercersburg Alma Mater, Eternal Father Strong to Save (Navy Hymn), Jesus I Live to Thee (Mercersburg Hymn), Hymn of Hope and from Man of LaMancha- The Impossible Dream.   Lyrics for Impossible Dream  I hope you will read these. I read them and think of my father and know he achieved his dreams - so many of them- but family his greatest.  Funerals are for the living but I learned they are also for the dead- it is another AND living and dead. It felt good to partner with so many to honor my father and comfort us with our farewell.  
 

We did not get to have the celebration of life we wanted and need. We did not have the whole family. We did not get to embrace friends and extended family. We left having something to look forward to- not sure when yet- summer would be nice but it maybe something else. We get to plan! We'll keep you posted.  Until then thank you for all those sharing the toasts you've been making. Thank you for the continued love and support and ways to care for my family and me.  We all said we know how loved Mom and Dad are and witnessed it these past three weeks. We were able to leave Mom on Sunday (with plans to return soon) knowing she is strong and surrounded by friends and family in Hagerstown.  I was welcomed home to Granville in the most amazing of ways and appreciate each action and word. I've overwhelmed and taking my time as I continue to say farewell and understand my season.  I do so grateful for my father.  I share a beautiful painting created for him by his neighbor- a very talented artist. He was so taken by this act- I loved hearing him tell his friend and physician- I've been immortalized in art!
Look closely and you'll see my Dad sitting at the Harpers Ferry Station. This is what he did - he watched his trains and talked to people.  Thank you Royce- this painting has been such a comfort these past few weeks.  My father lives on in so many ways. On Saturday, we did not say goodbye, only farewell.   


So, life on Newark-Granville Road is carrying on.... Saturday is Derby Day COVID-19 style. What does that mean?  Stay tuned to this blog and we'll share what we're up to. We hope you'll make your own julep- our recipe coming soon. We're so very sorry not to be together.  Life on Newark-Granville Road and MWS love a party. Many of you knew my Dad as the bet master and I appreciate you sharing that with me.

I will end with the lyrics of a song played on Saturday on the carillon.  It wasn't one that I associated with my father- that was Edelweiss- the lullaby he sang to me, the song we danced to at my wedding.  Climb Every Mountain's words are a lesson he now shares.  He is with me and us always and forever- encouraging us to learn and take the back roads!
Climb Every Mountain by Rodgers and Hammerstein

Climb every mountain
Search high and low
Follow every byway
Every path you know

Climb every mountain
Ford every stream
Follow every rainbow
Till you find your dream


A dream that will need
All the love you can give
Every day of your life
For as long as you live

Climb every mountain
Ford every stream
Follow every rainbow
Till you find your dream

A dream that will need
All the love you can give
Every day of your life
For as long as you live

Climb every mountain
Ford every stream
Follow every rainbow
Till you find your dream

Thursday, April 23, 2020

The gifts from my father- Michael Stoner April 1, 1942 - April 21, 2020

Below is the link to the obituary for my amazing Dad- Michael Watson Stoner.  I could type for hours about the gifts he provided.  I've shared many of them along the way on this blog, more recently as we've prepared for his death.  As I gather these thoughts I realize he prepared me for this time in history!!

  • Go for a walk in the woods.... not surprising he enjoyed Bill Bryson's book with the same title and really enjoyed Bryson's new book- The Body- a gift I game him to promote Denison family fun.
  • Denison!   It was my parents that pointed me to our fair college on the hill!  Daddy said- you don't know what you want to be professionally, you need a liberal arts school.  Mom said- let’s stop at Denison as we go out to Ohio- I've always heard good things.  (I had thought another school would be a fit- Mom knew best.  She had looked at Wooster when she was looking herself but ended up at Maryville, near Daddy at Virginia Tech!)
  • Love good food and try new menu items...okay sorry Daddy- we're going to be careful on this one- no bats! Covid humor!?!  My love of seafood- oysters, crab, ceviche....and ritual food- sitting around the table and talking while picking crabs or cooking fondue.
  • Scotch! Often I'm asked where did you learn to drink scotch? The answer- when I made my Dad's drinks I'd take a taste and I liked it!  When I graduated from college we discussed cocktails hour preferences- he encouraged me to try scotch.  I never looked back!  Is it 5 pm yet?
  • His beloved quote- The Best gift a father can give his children- love their mother.!  And oh, he did!  This is the foundation for our family, and I love how my mother loved him. Their marriage mattered and they included us in incredible family times and commitment.  You're seen this on the blog with vacations to the beach, holiday time and special celebrations like their 50th reunion almost five years ago.
  • He always encouraged us to be creative and use our imagination. He shared his love of art, music, reading and conversation. He was a lifelong learner and modeled this for us.


Life on Newark-Granville Road, thank you Daddy.

Monday, April 20, 2020

LOL is what the doctor ordered during COVID-19!

Here are the funnies that have been so appreciated in my life on Newark-Granville Road during the pandemic and with my father's end of life season laughter is the best medicine! 

Pluto!!! Oh the first time I saw this little pup and heard him refer to us as the two-leggeds I giggled until I cried.  He chronicles the toilet paper hording of the COVID-19 crisis so very well! Some of my colleagues joined me in this level of laughter.  My children do not.  Now I put Pluto on to laugh at my children's response!  insta: pluto.living    or  Pluto.living on YouTube

John Krasinski performs "Proud Mary" by Tina Turner   https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=390199881580985   Lipsync fun!!    Quite a few lip syncing performances out there- some produced during the pandemic with local friends- impressive and appreciated!

For years now I've enjoyed these music videos - certain subjects make me laugh harder than others- is it the song they choose, the subject, when there is more singing vs ? Check out the vault here  The Holderness Family Parodies!  Today I call attention to "True Colors"  Holderness-True Color music video   I like the singing and the talking box made me laugh...hmmmm sounds a bit pluto-ish!?

Back to the art (previous post)  since comedy and video production are the arts I have not deviated from the subject!  Back to theater- a week ago my sister and I shared a favorite musical production conversation with my father- Sarah and I had the same- A Chorus Line! And the next day I was treated to this:  https://www.broadwayworld.com/videoplay/Must-Watch-A-CHORUS-LINE-Revival-Cast-Reunites-In-Quarantine-20200416   What delighted me was the older dancers with nimble muscle memory, real life locations and audiences- look for the kids when watching and enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!  Okay I liked singing a long as well.  If I could do a tik-tok to this myself I would!

So I'm not really a stand-up comedian person- it is one of the things I should have put on the Facebook get to know one another lists.....but maybe it is just who is presenting  Here is another video that had me laughing and captures the real life happenings- like the stock market!!  https://www.facebook.com/BuzzFeed/videos/163886261536915/?v=163886261536915

I'll stop here,  you most likely have seen these.  I will say I selected pieces I think are worth watching and laughing over again and again and while we stay at home that is a good thing in our life on NG Road!


Thursday, April 16, 2020

The Arts are Alive- Join in and Your insights please!

Hello from Newark-Granville Road! I'm back for a bit: giving my sister quality time with my parents and giving me time with my family. Ohhhhh I do love my life on Newark-Granville Road.  So much to share, reflect, examine, confess....our "stay at home during COVID-19" provides much fodder! Today's post is about the arts.  And talk about an abundance of materials. I'm inspired and in awe of all the creativity and talent.  My father and I have had some great talks last week and not surprising to me he stressed the importance and how much he values imagination.  Today's post highlights that well!  Two things to share and encourage you to join me in marveling:

-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGisfpteKME&feature=youtu.be   "Sherry" from Jersey Boys cast in NY- "stuck at home production"  http://www.jonathan-cable.com-Jonathan Cable- my colleague's son.  My colleague- sent this to us and said we could share.  I just loved it.  I love the music, the peek in to NY homes/apartments, streets, personalities.  What a lovely gift for us all and an important message at the end. THANK YOU to all those going out to keep us safe and keeping our life as normal as possible.  Enjoy!

Can't go to The Works? The Works is coming to you thanks to Facebook!  Let’s make our own remote cocktails by the fire today and enjoy Kathryn Starr's amazing work.  The show is titled "Just Wingin
 It"   Kathryn's work makes me smile for so many reasons. I loved seeing her during February's Cocktails by the Fire! Ahhhhhh memories!  Spread the word please.

-Paper Assist! And last but not least- how are you accessing art - performing and visual!  I'm working on a grad school class project about the arts and culture subsector of philanthropy!  The class has been modified to include the COVID-19 impact.  I'm impressed by all the ways organizations are providing access- I'd love to hear about your thoughts and experiences- email me at ssleithauser@roadrunner.com please!

Life on Newark-Granville Road is rich and robust- even from home and all the more when you engage with me. THANK YOU for reading!